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Provocative Fart

Farting Provocatively

With the recent gloomy news from all over the world, I picked up on what I think is a very funny story.

Provocative

It appeared in one of the newspapers here with the title, ‘Austrian Police Defend Decision To Fine Man after ‘Provocative Fart.’ ‘ My first reaction was amazement that someone had been fined for what can only be described as a natural occurrence. Admittedly, some people can put real humdingers down in the most crowded of places. Well, maybe not so crowded these days, but you understand me? Then I thought about the use of the word, ‘provocative.’

Humdinger

How on earth can a fart, (humdinger or not) be described as provocative? I doubt the accused jumped onto the police officers and let one go, you know, a real 7-second bubbler! Then again, checking the dictionary for the meaning of provocative it says: …causing anger or another strong reaction, especially deliberately!  Well, I suppose a well-aimed botty burp with a noise level above 35 decibels and a certain, acrid aroma could be described as ‘provocative’ if it was deliberately aimed at the police officers.

Tommy Squeaker

I’ve known a few people in the past that have caused anger by letting out a Tommy Squeaker. It always seems to be when you are stuck somewhere, like on the platform of a bus waiting to come to a stop, or in a queue at the bar of the local pub. You never know who’s responsible either and once you get over your face turning green and trying to hold your breath for almost ever, there’s the fear that others think you are responsible! However, I still think they are done more for a ‘laugh’ than being provocative.

Pharrrrrrrrrrrrrp

I wonder why the police officers approached the suspect in the first place? From what I can gather, he was sat on a park bench minding his own business. Did they just pass him by and say ‘..hello, hello, hello, how are you today?’ only to be answered by Pharrrrrrrrrrrrp? The mind boggles. I did see someone on Facebook comment on the story, ‘Huh, you can’t even fart now without being fined!’ At the end of the day, we are all guilty of ‘putting one down’, it’s only natural. It’s just that some of us are a little more discreet than others. Have a nice day.

Here’s the original newspaper story if you’d like to read it.

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84 thoughts on “Farting Provocatively”

  13. Rachael
    Reply

    €500? Seriously? I mean, your post is hilarious and made me laugh, but what the fork? Brings a whole new meaning to the phrase “the law is an ass”

  15. Roadtirement
    Reply

    I have not laughed this hard during reading in a long time. I have wondered how to spell the sound of a trouser sneeze. You have answered that question with your “Pharrrrrrrrrrrrrrp”. The number of r’s describe the length of the methane emission. Brilliant!

  19. Yetismith
    Reply

    I actually saw a mention of the story a few days ago but I was scanning to see new disasters may have befallen the planet and I brushed it aside as too ridiculous to check out. However now I know I didn’t imagine it and you made me laugh which is of great value these days! Thanks Trev !

    1. Trev
      Reply

      Thank you, Yeti. I wouldn’t normally blog about this sort of thing, but as there’s so much gloom about it was too good to miss. Thank you for your kind words ????

  23. Peter's pondering
    Reply

    I wonder what evidence they will produce if he appeals the charge. Reminds me of the old classic of Lady Percival breaking wind during dinner and saying to the butler “Stop that at once James!” He responded “Of course m’lady, which way did it go?”

  27. Invisibly Me
    Reply

    I don’t know where to start, Trev ???? Tommy Squeaker, that’s not an expression I’ve heard before, but Botty Burp made me laugh too, hadn’t heard that in a long time. When I first read ‘provocative fart’ I thought it was referencing some kind of ‘come to bed’ fart. You know, like ‘come to bed’ eyes, except with a sexual fart. I’m not sure what’s worse: farting to provoke an argument, or farting to get laid. It makes me glad I’m out of the farting world these days as I’m rendered incapable of it (true story). Thanks for the giggles!! xx

    1. Trev
      Reply

      Thank you, Caz, glad it made you laugh. Well, you’ve got me as I’ve never heard of a ‘come to bed fart’ before. LOL. A sexual fart, no, I just can’t imagine that either. 🙂 Thanks for your kind words though, always very much appreciated 🙂

  31. pensitivity101
    Reply

    We all have our moments and in a group of three or more you can get away with it. There’s only so much you can blame on the dog but in some cases, it becomes a competition. See after the end credits of A Knights Tale with Heath Ledger and you’ll understand where I’m coming from. Dad’s were SPD (silent but deadly), Mum’s were rattlers (she did one in front of her boss and neither batted an eyelid),but Peter Sellers in the lift in the Return of the Pink Panther has to be the most hysterical occurrence ever. They are funny. A perfectly natural function, sometimes pungent, sometimes even sweet depending on what you’ve been eating, but we laugh. What else can you do? Unfortunately, sometime laughing makes the situation worse, and the fragrant bubbles have their own agenda.

  39. PaperKutzs
    Reply

    It took me awhile to be able to post this comment as I had to wait for my tears to dry. I was directed to this post from Sparksfromacombustiblemind. As I read this post I was reminded of an experience I had many years ago and felt compelled to share my flashback. Incase anyone is interested in the circumstances I am leaving a address. I hope the silly old sod doesn’t mind.

    https://paperkutzs.com/2020/06/18/re-do-you-toot-farthing-provocatively-sharing-a-flashback/

    1. Trev
      Reply

      Thank you so much, Paperkutz. I’m glad it gave you a good laugh. It’s what the world needs. Thank you for sharing and I don’t mind you putting your link on here at all. Thank you again for your very kind words. ????

  54. gold kitchen sink
    Reply

    Hi, I was thinking something about that too, but I decided to look for it on the internet, then I found this site and I found some interesting sentences here, I really like the way you express it and your show to write it.. I like your writing style. Good work!

  63. Nikhar
    Reply

    Been loving your posts Trev. Followed your blog for more future posts. I have also started blogging, would be happy if you can visit my blog and support me. Thanks and Happy blogging

  66. Herb
    Reply

    Well, I’m happy that the Austrian police have nothing at all more pressing to attend to. It must be a very peaceful place. Except, of course, for the occasionally provocative passer of gas.

  68. Hope
    Reply

    Really! Really! Really! ???? Is that what the COVID 19 has done to the world? ????We can no longer pass gas outside? ????When my son was younger around 2 years old, my friend was babysitting for him and when he passed gas she said???? “Tom did you parfait?” From that day on he said “I parfait!” ☺
    Since he is older, he no longer says that.

  71. gc
    Reply

    Well Trev I can see the police shooting the man for threatening their lives with a puff of air that could contain the COVID virus. Of course there is an old fart spewing off toxicity in the White House who is not only an air head but a menace to all those around him. Somehow justice is not being served in that country either.

  74. cheriewhite
    Reply

    I’m dying over here! ???????????????? And a fine for a fart? Wow! But not surprised, if a few special interests groups are advocating banning beef because cows fart and it’s bad for the environment, then you just know that being fined for farting isn’t too far behind. ????

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