Farting Provocatively

With the recent gloomy news from all over the world, I picked up on what I think is a very funny story.

Provocative

It appeared in one of the newspapers here with the title, ‘Austrian Police Defend Decision To Fine Man after ‘Provocative Fart.’ ‘ My first reaction was amazement that someone had been fined for what can only be described as a natural occurrence. Admittedly, some people can put real humdingers down in the most crowded of places. Well, maybe not so crowded these days, but you understand me? Then I thought about the use of the word, ‘provocative.’

Humdinger

How on earth can a fart, (humdinger or not) be described as provocative? I doubt the accused jumped onto the police officers and let one go, you know, a real 7-second bubbler! Then again, checking the dictionary for the meaning of provocative it says: …causing anger or another strong reaction, especially deliberately!  Well, I suppose a well-aimed botty burp with a noise level above 35 decibels and a certain, acrid aroma could be described as ‘provocative’ if it was deliberately aimed at the police officers.

Tommy Squeaker

I’ve known a few people in the past that have caused anger by letting out a Tommy Squeaker. It always seems to be when you are stuck somewhere, like on the platform of a bus waiting to come to a stop, or in a queue at the bar of the local pub. You never know who’s responsible either and once you get over your face turning green and trying to hold your breath for almost ever, there’s the fear that others think you are responsible! However, I still think they are done more for a ‘laugh’ than being provocative.

Pharrrrrrrrrrrrrp

I wonder why the police officers approached the suspect in the first place? From what I can gather, he was sat on a park bench minding his own business. Did they just pass him by and say ‘..hello, hello, hello, how are you today?’ only to be answered by Pharrrrrrrrrrrrp? The mind boggles. I did see someone on Facebook comment on the story, ‘Huh, you can’t even fart now without being fined!’ At the end of the day, we are all guilty of ‘putting one down’, it’s only natural. It’s just that some of us are a little more discreet than others. Have a nice day.

Here’s the original newspaper story if you’d like to read it.

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84 Comments
  • debjani6ghosh
    June 18, 2020

    Excellent post. 😀 I laughed so much on reading this.

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Thank you, Deb, glad it made you laugh ????

  • SueW
    June 18, 2020

    That was buttock scrunchingly funny! ????

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Thank you, Sue, a bit of fun in amongst all the doom and gloom ????

  • Bear
    June 18, 2020

    He obviously aimed better than ‘in their general direction’…

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Thank you, Bear. He obviously did. ????

  • Booky Glover
    June 18, 2020

    This is ridiculous. ????????????

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Thank you, Booky ????

  • cbholganza
    June 18, 2020

    In this case, farting was such sweet sorrow indeed. 🙂

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Indeed it was. Thank you ????

  • Spoilt Victorian Child
    June 18, 2020

    Tommy Squeaker is brilliant… I may use this term at least twice a day from now on…????

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Thank you, please do use the term and let it all out ????

  • Rachael
    June 18, 2020

    €500? Seriously? I mean, your post is hilarious and made me laugh, but what the fork? Brings a whole new meaning to the phrase “the law is an ass”

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      I know, a very expensive guff! Thank you, Rachael. ????

  • Roadtirement
    June 18, 2020

    I have not laughed this hard during reading in a long time. I have wondered how to spell the sound of a trouser sneeze. You have answered that question with your “Pharrrrrrrrrrrrrrp”. The number of r’s describe the length of the methane emission. Brilliant!

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Thank you Roadtirement, glad it gave you a laugh ????

  • susiesopinions
    June 18, 2020

    My husband would be continually fined.

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Oh dear, Susie ????????????

  • Yetismith
    June 18, 2020

    I actually saw a mention of the story a few days ago but I was scanning to see new disasters may have befallen the planet and I brushed it aside as too ridiculous to check out. However now I know I didn’t imagine it and you made me laugh which is of great value these days! Thanks Trev !

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Thank you, Yeti. I wouldn’t normally blog about this sort of thing, but as there’s so much gloom about it was too good to miss. Thank you for your kind words ????

  • Efrona Mor
    June 18, 2020

    Well, they should be arresting everyone for the silent offenders too then… (:

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      I think we’d all be guilty of that ????

  • Peter's pondering
    June 18, 2020

    I wonder what evidence they will produce if he appeals the charge. Reminds me of the old classic of Lady Percival breaking wind during dinner and saying to the butler “Stop that at once James!” He responded “Of course m’lady, which way did it go?”

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Lol!!! Thank you, Peter ????

  • Laleh Chini
    June 18, 2020

    LOL, it was needed.

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Thank you, Laleh ????

  • Invisibly Me
    June 18, 2020

    I don’t know where to start, Trev ???? Tommy Squeaker, that’s not an expression I’ve heard before, but Botty Burp made me laugh too, hadn’t heard that in a long time. When I first read ‘provocative fart’ I thought it was referencing some kind of ‘come to bed’ fart. You know, like ‘come to bed’ eyes, except with a sexual fart. I’m not sure what’s worse: farting to provoke an argument, or farting to get laid. It makes me glad I’m out of the farting world these days as I’m rendered incapable of it (true story). Thanks for the giggles!! xx

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Thank you, Caz, glad it made you laugh. Well, you’ve got me as I’ve never heard of a ‘come to bed fart’ before. LOL. A sexual fart, no, I just can’t imagine that either. 🙂 Thanks for your kind words though, always very much appreciated 🙂

  • Melanie B Cee
    June 18, 2020

    BWAHAHAHAHHA!!! I needed a good belly laugh and you provided one. Just hope I don’t squeek one out because of it. 😆

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Lol, Melanie. Be careful and thank you 😀

  • pensitivity101
    June 18, 2020

    We all have our moments and in a group of three or more you can get away with it. There’s only so much you can blame on the dog but in some cases, it becomes a competition. See after the end credits of A Knights Tale with Heath Ledger and you’ll understand where I’m coming from. Dad’s were SPD (silent but deadly), Mum’s were rattlers (she did one in front of her boss and neither batted an eyelid),but Peter Sellers in the lift in the Return of the Pink Panther has to be the most hysterical occurrence ever. They are funny. A perfectly natural function, sometimes pungent, sometimes even sweet depending on what you’ve been eating, but we laugh. What else can you do? Unfortunately, sometime laughing makes the situation worse, and the fragrant bubbles have their own agenda.

    • Trev
      June 19, 2020

      Thank you, I remember the Peter Sellers one. Your comment is very funny, thank you again ????

  • Mister Bump UK
    June 18, 2020

    It is funny, each week I respond to a post called a “provocative question”. From now on, it will take on a very new meaning!

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Thank you, Mr Bump. Lol, it will have a different meaning. 😀

  • jimflanigan
    June 18, 2020

    I learned new phrases: botty burp & Tommy squeaker!

    • Trev
      June 18, 2020

      Thank you, Jim, glad you learned something new today on here. 🙂

  • iammrsshecky
    June 18, 2020

    So funny! I cracked my buns in half!

    • Trev
      June 19, 2020

      Thank you, glad you found it funny ????

  • PaperKutzs
    June 19, 2020

    It took me awhile to be able to post this comment as I had to wait for my tears to dry. I was directed to this post from Sparksfromacombustiblemind. As I read this post I was reminded of an experience I had many years ago and felt compelled to share my flashback. Incase anyone is interested in the circumstances I am leaving a address. I hope the silly old sod doesn’t mind.

    https://paperkutzs.com/2020/06/18/re-do-you-toot-farthing-provocatively-sharing-a-flashback/

    • Trev
      June 19, 2020

      Thank you so much, Paperkutz. I’m glad it gave you a good laugh. It’s what the world needs. Thank you for sharing and I don’t mind you putting your link on here at all. Thank you again for your very kind words. ????

  • educater34 MSc.
    June 19, 2020

    I liked ,this is very useful

  • sheenmeem
    June 19, 2020

    Thanks. I had a good laugh.

    • Trev
      June 19, 2020

      Thank you, Sheen, I’m pleased it gave you a laugh. 🙂

  • nancynelsss
    June 20, 2020

    amazing work

    • Trev
      June 20, 2020

      Thank you, Nancy ????

  • KINDNESS
    June 20, 2020

    What a brilliant Author, you are Sir. A Treasures of the human Race Shalom ????????????

    • Trev
      June 20, 2020

      Thank you, Kindness ????

  • bekitschig
    June 21, 2020

    Too funny. There’s a Germany kids book König Pups [King Fart] that is the bomb right now! No matter what age, farts are always funny

    • Trev
      June 21, 2020

      Thank you, bekitschig, you’re right, they can be funny at any age. ????

  • Eldhiya Ghaits
    June 21, 2020

    Hi! Nice to find ur site!

    • Trev
      June 21, 2020

      Thank you, Welcome aboard ????

  • azurea20
    June 21, 2020

    Simpático post. Hablar sin rubor de las cosas naturales de la vida es saludable. Y un pedo también. Un saludo, amigo.

    • Trev
      June 21, 2020

      Thank you 🙂

      • azurea20
        June 21, 2020

        No sé por qué no puedo localizarte en el lector. Además los like no me los coge. Tampoco me llegan tus post al correo.

        • Trev
          June 21, 2020

          I don’t know why you can’t find me. I hope it gets sorted.

  • gold kitchen sink
    June 22, 2020

    Hi, I was thinking something about that too, but I decided to look for it on the internet, then I found this site and I found some interesting sentences here, I really like the way you express it and your show to write it.. I like your writing style. Good work!

  • Hilarious and had many smiles.Thank you for making the day lighter

    • Trev
      June 25, 2020

      Thank you very much, glad you enjoyed it. 🙂

  • miniworldto
    June 22, 2020

    Hello thanks for following ????

    • Trev
      June 22, 2020

      You’re welcome, thank you ????

  • Kally
    June 23, 2020

    This is way too funny! I fell off my chair.

    • Trev
      June 23, 2020

      Thank you, Kally, glad you found it funny. ????

  • Nikhar
    June 24, 2020

    Hahahahaha , Damn Funny. I can’t believe someone actually write post about Farting…. hehhehe

    • Trev
      June 25, 2020

      Thank you, Nikhar. 🙂

  • Nikhar
    June 24, 2020

    Been loving your posts Trev. Followed your blog for more future posts. I have also started blogging, would be happy if you can visit my blog and support me. Thanks and Happy blogging

  • majaalifee
    June 25, 2020

    Like ????????????

    • Trev
      June 25, 2020

      Thank you very much 🙂

  • Herb
    June 30, 2020

    Well, I’m happy that the Austrian police have nothing at all more pressing to attend to. It must be a very peaceful place. Except, of course, for the occasionally provocative passer of gas.

    • Trev
      June 30, 2020

      Haha, it must be very peaceful there if that’s their biggest problem. Thank you, Herb. 🙂

  • Hope
    July 2, 2020

    Really! Really! Really! ???? Is that what the COVID 19 has done to the world? ????We can no longer pass gas outside? ????When my son was younger around 2 years old, my friend was babysitting for him and when he passed gas she said???? “Tom did you parfait?” From that day on he said “I parfait!” ☺
    Since he is older, he no longer says that.

    • Trev
      July 2, 2020

      It seems in Austria it’s that way, Hope. But don’t let them stop you. It’s bad to hold it in. 🙂

  • Crazy Spirited Pun ????
    July 11, 2020

    relatable,lol!

  • gc
    July 18, 2020

    Well Trev I can see the police shooting the man for threatening their lives with a puff of air that could contain the COVID virus. Of course there is an old fart spewing off toxicity in the White House who is not only an air head but a menace to all those around him. Somehow justice is not being served in that country either.

    • Trev
      July 18, 2020

      Very true!! Thank you GC

  • pompa del sapone nero
    September 12, 2020

    I was reading this a month ago. And now I’m back to read it again

  • cheriewhite
    November 28, 2021

    I’m dying over here! ???????????????? And a fine for a fart? Wow! But not surprised, if a few special interests groups are advocating banning beef because cows fart and it’s bad for the environment, then you just know that being fined for farting isn’t too far behind. ????

    • Trev
      November 28, 2021

      Thank you, Cherie. You’re probably right about soon being fined for farting. I hope they don’t just base it on how much it stinks! 🙂

  • JosieHolford
    December 11, 2022

    Don’t get me started on kids and classroom farting as personal expression and communication.

    • Trev
      December 12, 2022

      Haha, sounds interesting, Josie, thank you 😊

      • JosieHolford
        December 12, 2022

        All I can say is that it blows both ways and control of the windows is a power play. (Ditto with stink bombs.)

        • Trev
          December 12, 2022

          Sounds like my kind of place. 😊 Thank you again, Josie.

  • kutukamus
    March 3, 2024

    A ‘petarade’, perhaps? (With the guy staring at the officers every ‘blurb’ of the way)

    • Trev
      March 3, 2024

      Thank you 😊